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Our collection of short funny quotes which are short straight to your head and mind-blowing. So far so good.
If you dont like me remember its mind over matter.
What are funny quotes. Wouldnt exercise be more fun if calories screamed while you burned them. Bill Murray 251. I intend to live forever.
So far so good. Steven Wright 252. Happiness is having a large loving caring close-knit family in another city.
George Burns 253. First the doctor told me the good news. I was going to have a disease named after me.
Funny quotes on naiveté It is better to live one day as a lion than 100 years as a sheep Donald Trump retweeting a Benito Mussolini quote. On the keyboard of life always keep one finger on the Escape key. Dont talk about yourself so much well do that when you leave.
Behind every great man is a woman rolling her eyes. Funny Quotes On Life. Knowledge is knowing a tomato is a fruit.
Wisdom is not putting it in a fruit salad. Our collection of short funny quotes which are short straight to your head and mind-blowing. My dream job would be the karma delivery service 26.
Real girls are never perfect and perfect girls are never real. Life isnt finding shelter in the storm. Its about learning to dance in the rain.
If life gives you lemons make apple juice and make people wonder how the hell you did it. Here are 10 funny life quotes that dont need an explanation because they can be interpreted in many ways and I think a lot of them explain themselves. Tell a man there are 300 billion stars in the universe and hell believe you.
Here are 60 short and funny motivational quotes to help brighten your day. 60 Short Funny Motivational Quotes 1. When tempted to fight fire with fire remember that the Fire Department usually uses water.
Funny Quotes and Sayings. Best quotes about funny and Sayings Your secrets are safe with me I wasnt even listening. If you dont like me remember its mind over matter.
I dont mind and you dont matter 1. My friend thinks he s smart. He said onions are the only food that makes you cry.
So I threw a coconut on his face. If youre looking for positive thinking quotes that are also funny then youve come to the right place. Inspiring positive quotes can give you a much-needed pep talk just when you need it the most.
Because positive thinking helps with your emotional and physical health from improving your daily life and relieving stress to helping with your physical health and well-being. But sometimes quotes framed by others suit perfectly on us our state of mind and our lifestyle. So lets just say youve decided to go with something that is funny something that has a cute factor while it being witty at the same time.
And of course it perfectly describes you. Here is a collection of such cute and funny quotes and. Have you seen these funny witty quotes to sharpen your cleverness.
Quotes about having fun with family and friends. I think Ill work all my life. When youre having fun why stop having fun Helen Thomas.
Make a commitment to having fun. See your best friends and make time for your hobbies and passions Robert Holden. There is never enough time to enjoy what you love.
Funny inspirational quotes to put a smile on your face. Always remember that you are unique just like everybody else. Todays opportunities erase yesterdays failures.
It could be that your purpose in life is to serve as a warning to others. One-liners short funny quotes sayings thoughts and captions for your bio social status self-talk motto mantra signs posters wallpapers backgrounds. The first time I see a jogger smiling Ill consider it.
Joan Rivers Click to tweet When nothing is going right go left. Cool Funny Quotes Amusing Sayings and Quotations. My bed is a magical place where I suddenly remember everything I forgot to do.
Life is like a hot bath. It feels good while youre in it but the longer you stay in the more wrinkled you get. A best friend is like a four-leaf clover hard to find lucky to have.